A woman has planned her own funeral so that her children won’t have to deal with the stress of guessing what she would have wanted – and says she wants to be seen off with the least possible amount of fuss. Beverley Rose, 75, said she was “nothing if not a forward planner” and didn’t want to leave anything to chance after her demise.
She has four children and, having organised her own parents’ funerals, Beverley wanted to save them from the bother of it all – so she’s laid out exactly what she wants to happen. First of all she’ll be transported to the crematorium as cheaply as possible, cremated in a ceremony with few guests – then a big party will be hosted, at her expense, months later.
Beverley, from Kent, said: “I have been planning my funeral for a very long time, I’m nothing if not a forward thinker. I know very much what I want, and it’s slightly unusual so I think I should let my kids know.
“Basically I want the cheapest possible way of getting rid of the body, I’d go in a bin liner – I want to be taken from wherever I go straight to the crematorium and burned, in the cheapest possible coffin – I think it’s about £120.
“I don’t want anyone there, then about three months later, I want a big party, because people will stop being sad then hopefully, and the ash – or a small amount of it – will go into a rocket.
“I’ve left the money for a jolly big party, at the end of which there will be a piece of music I choose; at the moment, I’m thinking Jeff Beck.
“Hopefully one or two people will say nice things, and they’ll all get drunk really.
“I want people to think, ‘God she was jolly good fun and she’s gone out the way she’s lived her life’.
Beverley, who worked in advertising, said she organised her own funeral because she’s “fairly selfish”, and doesn’t wany anyone else mucking up the plans.
She continued: “If I’m quivering and dementia-y I’ll know it’s sorted. When my dad died, when we tried to organise his funeral, it was a nightmare. Plus, when my husband died it was awful.
“People worry and fret and they’re said, I think they would want to do what they think you want – but they’re second-guessing unless you’ve talked about it.
“My plans are always changing, the other thing is you need to keep up with who you want to come.
“How would my kids know who to invite? They don’t know who I went to school with when I was 20.
“It would be a hell of a good party, at least all my friends will be there.
“There are some people who I wouldn’t want to go, for personal reasons.
